My Father was the CEO of a family run food business, Okumura Foods. He used to be kind and loving, but once he saw that he could use his status as a CEO to gain respect in the political world it always became about how he could get more power and more standing.
[She frowns, knowing that telling this story was always the hardest. Always.]
One particular business deal that he made was to force me to marry a man I had no feelings for. I couldn't argue it because I didn't want to ruin his reputation, and I dealt with it because I found no other way out.
Hajime pauses with his fingers in the dirt, almost seeming to forget about what he was doing as he listens to her story. Listens, and feels his heart sink into his shoes.
And then he's angry, bitterly angry. His fingers squeeze into the dirt before he stops himself, almost surprised at what he was doing as he looks back to her. He's angry on her behalf, obviously. But there's something that resonates with him, too; it's not the same, it's not nearly the same, but the feeling of having no future, of having everyone else decide what's important for you... yeah. It makes his blood boil with useless resentment.]
But... you didn't end up marrying the guy, right? [he ventures, unable to put exactly why he's so angry at the thought into words. Just because he doesn't have a future to look forward to doesn't mean anyone else should feel that way, either!] I mean, there's no way...
[That sounds like something from a manga or a TV drama. Not something that could happen to someone in real life, that he's spoken to.]
She doesn't want people to be angry for her sake. She grew up knowing her Father had the capability to be kind and compassionate. But she also knew that she grew up with expectations. What she wore, who she spoke to, how she was to carry herself in front of other people. This was the only life that Haru knew.
But she looks at Hinata, quickly resolving his burning questions.]
I have to be honest and say that the only thing that Sugimura-san was into was having a high schooler as a Fiance, it was a turn on for him. I truthfully did everything I could to not have to be around him.
[She sighs.] Fear not, I did not end up marrying him.
My Father has passed as well. [And someone here on this ship? They are at fault for that.]
He manages not to say it aloud, though his revulsion probably shows on his face. He's still a painfully honest boy, in spite of himself, and his emotions are never really a mystery.
Hajime doesn't know what to say, though. It sounds like it has a happy ending, and while he can't really speak toward how she feels about her own father, he can't quite stop an uncharitable good from floating across his mind at the fact that he's dead. What kind of asshole would make his daughter marry some guy like that in the modern age??]
I'm... sorry to hear about your father? [he's not quite certain if that's the right thing to say in this kind of context,] But... I'm glad it worked out. You're the kind of person who should be able to make a future for yourself.
[She understands that look, it was a look her friends gave her too. Before they decided to help her in her attempt to save her Father. But that was another story for another time. She didn't want to sour the mood too much more. Plus that would entail telling Hinata she is a Phantom Thief, and that can't come out yet.]
I will admit that I gained my life back, but the things I have had to struggle with since then are...measurably almost worse.
[It's a lot.]
My trust for adults is so little because of the things I grew up with. It influences a lot of my decisions.
[He just nods. After hearing that, he can't... really fault her, not at all. Even trying to justify it by saying that not all adults can be assholes like that seems like it would ring hollow in the face of her experiences.]
I... never experienced anything like that, so I don't think I can really get it, but... I get where you're coming from, [he says finally, glancing sideways to her.] I can't blame you at all for not wanting to trust adults.
[He hesitates, looking back to the plant he'd paused in the middle of uprooting as if surprised to remember that oh yeah, he's had his hands buried in dirt for the past several minutes now. Really, he's trying to figure out how to put what he wants to say into words.]
But... you can trust me, okay?
[It's not nearly what he wanted to say. He wanted to say something cool, about how he'd protect her (laughable, really) or something, but. That's the best he's got.]
[It did ring hollow is the thing. Even if Hinata preached that "not all adults can be assholes", it took her the longest time to even lend any of her trust to Sojiro back at home. Nothing quite like growing up under a strict Father who didn't want you to run your own life to give you trust issues for the rest of your life.
Which, is entirely why Haru seems a little surprised at Hinata's comment.
She has grown into being a little easier with her distrust of people in general though. Something that her friends were willing to help her through.]
As long as you don't give me a reason to distrust you. I can trust you.
[There is a pause before she says:] I want you to be able to trust me as well.
[He says that a little quickly, because he doesn't have to think about it at all. He doesn't want to do anything to make someone like Haru distrust him, whatever it takes. She's been hurt by enough people she's trusted, he doesn't want to make that hurt worse.]
And... I do.
[There's a beat of hesitation, a pause where he does have to think about that answer. Because he does trust her, he just... can't talk about the Project just yet. He just isn't ready.]
I mean, you're trusting me to move plants in your garden. As long as I don't mess that up, I should be good, right?
[He cracks a small smile, clearly meaning it as a joke.]
[Well, now that they've established they both trust each other, with conditions, Hajime can freely return his attention to moving the plants. A little more nervously, what with the reminder that plants are important to her, but it's fine. He can't let her down.]
You said... you used to keep a garden at school, right? [he says after a few moments of silence.] Do you miss it?
[Either the garden, or school itself. Or Earth in general, really.]
I miss it more than I thought I would. At first... it was sort of an obligation. But it turned into my happy place. The place I could go and no one would come after me or judge me or talk behind my back.
[She is the daughter of a wealthy company CEO, so, no matter what she does? Her Father and their family wealth is always part of the equation. Haru has many separate issues that don't revolve around her Father... and she has never been this open about them to a stranger.
[He nods, lips twisting into a sad smile. He understands the need to have somewhere to go to be alone, where he couldn't overhear the people whispering about him.]
Me?
[Hajime sounds almost surprised to have the question turned back to him, and he frowns, looking down at the pots as he pats more dirt around one of them. What does he miss about school?]
Um... well, there was a fountain on the school grounds that I could see the Main Course from. Nanami would meet up with me after school so we could play video games together there. If she wasn't trying to drag me to an arcade, that is.
[Dear memories, bittersweet memories. That same fountain where they'd met is the same place he'd said goodbye to her. The same place he'd been too much of a coward to tell her what he was planning to do, because he knew he'd lose his resolve if he tried.
He's quiet a few seconds longer before realizing that Haru was still speaking, and it takes him a second to catch up.]
What? Oh, that's... yeah. It was the same for me, until Nanami came along.
...Do you like video games, Haru? We should play sometime.
[His lips curve into a smile as he nods. If she never really got to hang out with friends after school, then... it's not a bad idea to show her what his afternoons were usually like, right? And maybe she'll even have fun doing it.]
I can show you how to play Gala Omega... it's the only game I have right now. Mishima and I are working to try to bring games to the communicators. I mean, we can't only be focusing on survival stuff, right? We'd go crazy without fun stuff to do.
[Her lips turn up into a smile for probably the first or second time in this conversation. Talking about her Father often makes her gloomy. But Hinata was very diligent about turning the conversation into something much more positive.]
We do need something to do besides survival, I can agree with that.
Maybe if we keep looking around we may find a second system? I would definitely not put it past this place. I found a few of my own belongings in weird places.
[Her mask, which she won't mention here. Was found hanging off of a coffee machine. The stuff for her garden was scattered all around the ship. It really is wild how much this place holds.]
Maybe... the weird thing is, I'd walked by that fabricator in the cafeteria every day, and I'm sure I'd have noticed it if it were there the whole time. You know?
[Satisfied with that particular plant, he sits back, looking over the garden for what to work on next.]
Maybe you're right, and I just haven't found it yet. Could be anywhere, like...
[Hm, there's a big enough pot. He moves over and picks it up suddenly, as if he truly expects a second Nantendo Game Girl to be hiding underneath the plants.]
Damn, I really thought it'd be there...
[He gives her a wry smile. Please smile back at his dumb antics while he carefully sets the pot back down.]
At that point we must ask ourselves... is there someone else on this ship that we don't know about? Someone who is specifically hoarding our things and dolling them out to us when they think it a worthy time?
[The theory is a little out there. But who is to say that it isn't true?
She laughs when he picks up the pot, looking for the second game system.]
[Oh, she laughed... even better. That's all he can ever ask for when he's hanging out with any of his friends; just making them laugh is enough, especially when circumstances on this station are anything but normal. He grins at the sound of her laughter and just drops down to sit on the floor.]
I guess I'll just have to keep trying, yeah. Like that one video game protagonist who smashes pots for treasure.
[Was there an underlying threat there? Maybe. Haru probably isn't a person that Hinata wants to piss off on any day of the week. She's fiercer than she appears to be in most respects.]
I'll even help you look, if you are that desperate.
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[She frowns, knowing that telling this story was always the hardest. Always.]
One particular business deal that he made was to force me to marry a man I had no feelings for. I couldn't argue it because I didn't want to ruin his reputation, and I dealt with it because I found no other way out.
[She will let that sink in.]
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Hajime pauses with his fingers in the dirt, almost seeming to forget about what he was doing as he listens to her story. Listens, and feels his heart sink into his shoes.
And then he's angry, bitterly angry. His fingers squeeze into the dirt before he stops himself, almost surprised at what he was doing as he looks back to her. He's angry on her behalf, obviously. But there's something that resonates with him, too; it's not the same, it's not nearly the same, but the feeling of having no future, of having everyone else decide what's important for you... yeah. It makes his blood boil with useless resentment.]
But... you didn't end up marrying the guy, right? [he ventures, unable to put exactly why he's so angry at the thought into words. Just because he doesn't have a future to look forward to doesn't mean anyone else should feel that way, either!] I mean, there's no way...
[That sounds like something from a manga or a TV drama. Not something that could happen to someone in real life, that he's spoken to.]
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She doesn't want people to be angry for her sake. She grew up knowing her Father had the capability to be kind and compassionate. But she also knew that she grew up with expectations. What she wore, who she spoke to, how she was to carry herself in front of other people. This was the only life that Haru knew.
But she looks at Hinata, quickly resolving his burning questions.]
I have to be honest and say that the only thing that Sugimura-san was into was having a high schooler as a Fiance, it was a turn on for him. I truthfully did everything I could to not have to be around him.
[She sighs.] Fear not, I did not end up marrying him.
My Father has passed as well. [And someone here on this ship? They are at fault for that.]
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He manages not to say it aloud, though his revulsion probably shows on his face. He's still a painfully honest boy, in spite of himself, and his emotions are never really a mystery.
Hajime doesn't know what to say, though. It sounds like it has a happy ending, and while he can't really speak toward how she feels about her own father, he can't quite stop an uncharitable good from floating across his mind at the fact that he's dead. What kind of asshole would make his daughter marry some guy like that in the modern age??]
I'm... sorry to hear about your father? [he's not quite certain if that's the right thing to say in this kind of context,] But... I'm glad it worked out. You're the kind of person who should be able to make a future for yourself.
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I will admit that I gained my life back, but the things I have had to struggle with since then are...measurably almost worse.
[It's a lot.]
My trust for adults is so little because of the things I grew up with. It influences a lot of my decisions.
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I... never experienced anything like that, so I don't think I can really get it, but... I get where you're coming from, [he says finally, glancing sideways to her.] I can't blame you at all for not wanting to trust adults.
[He hesitates, looking back to the plant he'd paused in the middle of uprooting as if surprised to remember that oh yeah, he's had his hands buried in dirt for the past several minutes now. Really, he's trying to figure out how to put what he wants to say into words.]
But... you can trust me, okay?
[It's not nearly what he wanted to say. He wanted to say something cool, about how he'd protect her (laughable, really) or something, but. That's the best he's got.]
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Which, is entirely why Haru seems a little surprised at Hinata's comment.
She has grown into being a little easier with her distrust of people in general though. Something that her friends were willing to help her through.]
As long as you don't give me a reason to distrust you. I can trust you.
[There is a pause before she says:] I want you to be able to trust me as well.
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[He says that a little quickly, because he doesn't have to think about it at all. He doesn't want to do anything to make someone like Haru distrust him, whatever it takes. She's been hurt by enough people she's trusted, he doesn't want to make that hurt worse.]
And... I do.
[There's a beat of hesitation, a pause where he does have to think about that answer. Because he does trust her, he just... can't talk about the Project just yet. He just isn't ready.]
I mean, you're trusting me to move plants in your garden. As long as I don't mess that up, I should be good, right?
[He cracks a small smile, clearly meaning it as a joke.]
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[And when Haru promises? She means it. She would only ever break a promise if she were put in a position where she had to.
But she doesn't want to think about that right now.]
Plants are very important to me, Hajime-san. You are lucky I am letting you handle them. Just continue being delicate with them.
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You said... you used to keep a garden at school, right? [he says after a few moments of silence.] Do you miss it?
[Either the garden, or school itself. Or Earth in general, really.]
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[She is the daughter of a wealthy company CEO, so, no matter what she does? Her Father and their family wealth is always part of the equation. Haru has many separate issues that don't revolve around her Father... and she has never been this open about them to a stranger.
But they trust each other, right?]
What do you miss about your school, Hajime-san?
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Me?
[Hajime sounds almost surprised to have the question turned back to him, and he frowns, looking down at the pots as he pats more dirt around one of them. What does he miss about school?]
Um... well, there was a fountain on the school grounds that I could see the Main Course from. Nanami would meet up with me after school so we could play video games together there. If she wasn't trying to drag me to an arcade, that is.
[It was always games...]
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[It sounds like it might be that way anyways. There isn't anything wrong with that. The roof is to her like the fountain is to Hinata.]
I never really went out and did anything with other kids my age after school. So the garden was it for me.
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[Dear memories, bittersweet memories. That same fountain where they'd met is the same place he'd said goodbye to her. The same place he'd been too much of a coward to tell her what he was planning to do, because he knew he'd lose his resolve if he tried.
He's quiet a few seconds longer before realizing that Haru was still speaking, and it takes him a second to catch up.]
What? Oh, that's... yeah. It was the same for me, until Nanami came along.
...Do you like video games, Haru? We should play sometime.
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[She hums in thought. The rainy afternoons spent in Leblanc's attic were where she gained her first knowledge of video games.]
I'm not very good at them, but I wouldn't be against playing with you!
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I can show you how to play Gala Omega... it's the only game I have right now. Mishima and I are working to try to bring games to the communicators. I mean, we can't only be focusing on survival stuff, right? We'd go crazy without fun stuff to do.
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[Her lips turn up into a smile for probably the first or second time in this conversation. Talking about her Father often makes her gloomy. But Hinata was very diligent about turning the conversation into something much more positive.]
We do need something to do besides survival, I can agree with that.
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[He huffs a humorless laugh, shaking his head with wry resignation.]
Maybe I'll find another console in the cafeteria sometime. The first one was pretty inexplicable, so what's one more thing?
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[Her mask, which she won't mention here. Was found hanging off of a coffee machine. The stuff for her garden was scattered all around the ship. It really is wild how much this place holds.]
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[Satisfied with that particular plant, he sits back, looking over the garden for what to work on next.]
Maybe you're right, and I just haven't found it yet. Could be anywhere, like...
[Hm, there's a big enough pot. He moves over and picks it up suddenly, as if he truly expects a second Nantendo Game Girl to be hiding underneath the plants.]
Damn, I really thought it'd be there...
[He gives her a wry smile. Please smile back at his dumb antics while he carefully sets the pot back down.]
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[The theory is a little out there. But who is to say that it isn't true?
She laughs when he picks up the pot, looking for the second game system.]
Try again another day? You might find it then?
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I guess I'll just have to keep trying, yeah. Like that one video game protagonist who smashes pots for treasure.
[Legend of... what was it again?]
...Oh, uh, I won't smash these ones, though!
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[Was there an underlying threat there? Maybe. Haru probably isn't a person that Hinata wants to piss off on any day of the week. She's fiercer than she appears to be in most respects.]
I'll even help you look, if you are that desperate.